Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Turn over a new leaf

Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Turn over a new leaf

“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” ~~ Mark Twain
Turning over a “new leaf” can take a whole different meaning based on the perspective of an individual and the depth of his/her soul. The truth in our society is that there exists no single person who does not want to do something to help another, but it is equally a fact that nobody wants to be a first.

There is no limit to the good we can do if we don’t care who gets the credit and any social being cannot exist without mutual help. Therefore, the need to aid has a right to ask it from their fellow men and no one with the power of granting can refuse it without guilt.

The Sea of Galilee and the Dead Sea are made of the same water. It flows down, clear and cool, from the heights of Hermon and the roots of the cedars of Lebanon. The Sea of Galilee makes beauty of it, for the Sea of Galilee has an outlet, it gets to give. It gathers in its riches that it may pour them out again to fertilize the Jordan plain. But the Dead Sea with the same water creates mayhem. For the Dead Sea has no outlet. It only gets to keep.
George Bernard Shaw once said “The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that’s the essence of inhumanity.”
No man has ever been honored for what he received in life. Honor has been the reward for what he gave. In our everyday lives we can never meet a person whose greatest need was anything other than real, unconditional love. You can find it in a simple act of kindness toward someone who needs help. There is no mistaking love. You feel it in your heart. It is the common fiber of life, the flame that heals our soul, energizes our spirit and supplies passion to our lives. It is our connection to God and to each other.
The end point remains that as many hands that join us in this self satisfying endeavor would only strengthen the purpose and ability to touch multiple lives in need.

It’s unfair to say money remains the only charitable contribution expected by any non-profit organization, ours included. Nothing is farther from the truth. What matters more is the ability and intention to join hands through social service, to get one’s hands dirty in removing the desperation and inconveniences of our fellow beings. True Charity has eyes only for the need and never the cause. As Mother Teresa once said “We cannot do great things on this Earth, only small things with great love.”
Maybe we should all turn over a “New leaf”.Today.

“If you haven't got charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.” ~~ Bob Hope

Monday, March 10, 2008


I'd like you to meet me. I am an author (Okay! Okay! I am trying to be one!). Optimistic?(you bet!).With stars in my eyes,A pen in hand and wads and wads of virtual paper waiting to translate my thoughts into words.For your approval,of course!!!Okay, so now that is settled, let's get down to the brass tacks. So what do I write about?
A well-wisher suggested "Intricacies of Life in a Metro". There is so much that one can write about this.Seems so deceptively easy …...But Would you want to read about something so plainly boring???I would'nt.....So that get's ruled out.Another friend suggest an autobiography,experiences in my life.For two reasons, I veto that topic.One,Iam not a vain,out of job celebritytrying to cling on to a already exhausted life of fame.Two,There aren't any experiences worth sharing in my life,which would raise eyebrowsor interest readers......unless I make up a few!!!
Oh, my! If the starting point itself is going to pose such a problem,what should this poor writer do? Where exactly to start, considering that the decision on a topic is by itself,so daunting an obstacle at the very outset!
But No fear.After further deliberations,i did come up with a topic...."Words!!!!!"
Read on…
A lesser essayist would throw in the towel. Not this one. No way! Iam trying a different tack: It's just about words.....a essential part of everyday life.Well Is it?? Start writing??? Easier said than done!But No harm in giving it a shot.The Acceptance of the topic can be deciphered as the momentum flows.So here goes......
The power of the word can never be underestimated. As so rightly and famously said"The pen is mightier than the sword." In the hands of a competent 'wordsmith', words can be enticed into performing Herculean tasks. Words can be coaxed and cajoled into communicating crisp, clear and concise connotations comprehensively. Words can be very temperamental, too. An expert at word craft would effortlessly be able to whip up public sentiment or public outcry with the judicious use of words. Nations have won their independence, or rid themselves of their tyrannical regimes, thanks to well-worded exhorting propaganda speeches and leaflets from leaders with the gift of the gab.
In the commercial world, the effective communicator - the user of words to the best effect, is the one who wins. The eye-catching advertisement,the persuasive salesman - these are the ultimate victors. In the legal world, more cases have been won by way of a lucid presentation of an effectualargument than by any other means. On the other hand, even a watertight case can be messed up solely due to an ineffective presentation.
There do exist situations which cannot be handled by words. Extreme grief, for instance. The loss of a loved one is one such occasion where even the choicest selection of words, however sincere, can never, ever, hope to alleviate the misery felt by the grieved. Another example would be,how does one end such an article? Words fail me!
This can go on and on…....Decisions, decisions! Have I taken a Topic too much to handle????And the utter helplessness of not being able to resolve this simple issue,at my first attempt at writing!!!!!It Hurts,But I'll go on.......
Generally, when people get their way with others, they do it with words; they want others to agree with their point of view, give them what they want, or do what they ask. Such people’s victims unknowingly make choices based on emotional appeals and logical tricks, which allows the manipulator to controltheir thinking, and their behavior, setting themselves up to be used for someone else’s interests. For example, in William Shakespeare’s The Tragedy of Julius Caesar, Cassius persuades Brutus to turn against his best friend, Decius reinterprets Calphurnia’s dream that leads Caesar to his fate, and Antony convinces the crowd of plebeians to turn against the honorable Brutus. Their powerful words are used as a tool to mislead and deceive even the most intelligent men in this tragic drama.
More and more options! And still more decisions to be taken! Not the wavering writer's cup of tea! No thank you, if you please!
"Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can never hurt you", goes one playground rhyme. How wrong this can be should be quite clear,as we all know that words can really hurt a person. Although we can learn from them, words that breathe hate are no good. When obscene words are directed at us, they can cause just as much pain, if not more, than a hit. When people start to use obscenities with ethnic or racial slurs,it will and should push some sensitive buttons in all of us.
The way things have taken shape, at this juncture, even the most optimistic of writers will find the outlook bleak and drive even the most persistentscribe to call it a day and wish the hopes of writing an article, goodbye. But, wait!! On second thoughts, perhaps a sequential narration of this discussion,by itself, meets the requirements of an article!
The writer has done it at last!!At Least he thinks he has.But The question remains.........Do You????

Blame it on the Boss

Probably the most convenient and famous of phrases used across the world of Corporates.Why then write an article on it, you might ask?Call it taking the phrase to the next level,or maybe it's because I myself use it as freely as breathing the air.Either ways,Iam sure I belong to a crowded club of believers!!!

As many people in industry today well know, the comic strip Dilbert skewers corporate life brilliantly. His self-impressed boss doesn't have a clue, often demanding ridiculous projects and killing sensible ones. I'm sure nothing like that ever happens at our company, but many people in the corporate world think it hits darn close to home.

But how serious are we when we use the phrase??Is it just a catch phrase while enjoying a cup of hot coffee during a hectic day or during the "gossip" weekends where words flow freely after a much required strong drink finds it's place in your guts?Let's look at it in a logical perspective.

Scenario One............Everybody does it...So I go with the flow....Fair enough!Very rarely do you find a person loving his/her boss,(most probably he/she is the one who never has any friends at work and has lunch alone!!!!)This though is very illogical and taking into consideration that people hate anyone asking them for deadlines,results and improvement,It is not the individual who is the problem but the term as such.So that would mean that not all managers are bad at what they do.It has to be the term "boss" which gets on to your nerves.You can be rest assured that even your boss would be blaming his boss......So we arrive at the conclusion that all managers are good people,but we just hate them for holding a position higher than us.

Results:Hmmm......Interesting but not very convincing isn’t it?

Scenario Two........"People cannot be managed.Inventories can be managed but people must be led."Ross Perot, founder, EDS Corporation probably has a point here.So it's a question of Leadership and of probably good managers and bad managers.One thing seems sure......At some point of time you would have to deal with a bad manager.It’s as inevitable as death and taxes.A thin line determines whether your boss is a good or bad manager.But quite often it turns out to be a one off incident or scenario deciding the boss's fate.But that's the easier way.After that,even the coffee machine breaking down is blamed on the boss!!!

Results:Much more logical,So lets take up the discussion from this point on.(who cares,I hear you say???)

You Should......For the simple reason that blaming your boss may make you feel high,for the moment.But that's all it does.A good drink would do that better.If you’ve never had a bad boss, count yourself lucky. Bosses who lose their temper, play favorites or can’t communicate—and that’s just a start on the list of managerial misbehavior—can make going in to work annoying, humiliating and infuriating. And, unless you’re independently wealthy, you’re probably not in a position to tell your boss to take this job and shove it.

Becoming aware that this is a problem is the first step.If you do get stuck with a lousy boss, you’ll need a strategy for dealing with the things that your boss does—or doesn’t do—that drive you crazy.Blaming him or her would get you only so far.So it's the prerogative of each individual in the corporate world to know his/her boss.Here are your options:

Is he/she the Micro managing boss?---One who does'nt expect too much from you and you start wondering how he/she became a manager at all????

A Ballistic Boss?----One who yells his way up the corporate ladder and you always seem to be the favorite victim.When things are going fine,you might probably be treated like an amoeba.

An Unreasonable Boss??----A very close relative of the Ballistic boss,who has expectations that range from unreasonable to impossible.

An Inexperienced Boss???----The kind who came out of school,were smart, won awards, came into companies,worked their tails off, got promoted, and their whole lives they’ve always been recognized for their abilities and skills,But all of a sudden they have to be able to talk to people, to manage people and to evaluate people.An in most cases, they just don’t know how to do it.

After the identification parade is through,We can probably decide on two things.Whether your boss is a bad manager or a good one.If it is the former,Well,career coach Gordon Miller has three words for you to quick fix a bad-manager situation,: "Forget about it."

But Otherwise,the next and probably most important factor would be to empathize!!!!!Put yourself in your boss's shoes and imagine what you would've done differently in a given situation?It is neccessary of course to understand during this,that they have a boss of their own.

Whenever You think of what it is like to be a boss today, You should think of the Commodore Hotel in Beirut.This is on account of an article that came out During the Beirut Civil War.The Commodore Hotel was the hotel of choice for journalists. When you checked into the hotel they didn't ask, "Smoking or nonsmoking?" At the Commodore they asked, "Shelling side or sniper side?"

A Boss's situation is probably the same.Not making any excuses for bad bossing, but employees also need to learn to appreciate the challenges of bossing today. Like the Commodore, it's tough to boss when you're getting sniped by your employees and shelled by your own boss.

The good boss might still continue to be an oxyMORON? Born of family conditioning, Indians are generally believed to give their bosses greater leeway. Levels of respect and tolerance start high, but once they discover feet of clay, the venom can be deadly. Says Arvind Agarwal, president and CEO, group HRD, RPG group, and president of the National HR Network, “We expect too much from our bosses. When you have no hobbies and your work rules your life, the boss becomes larger than life.” (Ya Rite!)

But from a employee perspective a simple advice would be: "Don't whine to anyone about your boss; if he's that clueless, go get another.Otherwise, you're more of a chump than he is."

Statutory warning---It's quite possible the same boss awaits you in your new environment with a new name,new methods and new pay...but same nonsense!!!!

For the bosses:

BROKEN promises can be forgiven. Poor pay is endurable. Blurry career prospects can be lived with.Out of the ten compelling reasons why people quit their jobs, the reason that came out on top was — Bad Boss. Surprised? Well, if you’re not, consider this: Bad Pay trails at a distant No 10!

But in a generic term,the fundamentals of being a good boss are respectful treatment and a concern for fairness in the workplace. Not getting that is one of the most common complaints that people have about jobs, even more than pay.Today to gain control, one should first let go of it. So, if you treat your teams as equals, they'll roll their sleeves up to get the job done well for you.As Warren Bennis says:

"The imperial leader is dead as a dodo. In a complex world where nobody has all the answers, true leaders abandon their egos and thrive on the talent of their followers".

Bosses do need to be seen to be fair, but keeping up the act can be hard work. And at the end of the day, there’s still no guarantee that they’ll like you.Take an example of an executive working under an American boss in one of the world’s largest software companies. His complaint? The boss confuses him by acting like a buddy, then switching to boss mode. “Keeping track of the dividing line is tough on both of us,” he complains “I never know when a joke I made may be factored into a performance evaluation.”

Yes Boss.......Life Sucks!!!!! :-)